Losing A Friend Like Bob Has Been Rough

Losing A Friend Like Bob Has Been Rough

Bob King’s Memorial piece including mint and hard candy

My wife Tina and my grandson recently said goodbye to our friend Bob. As we arrived for the calling hours, the line was beginning. We signed the guest book, and then my wife picked up the little plastic bag with Bob’s picture on it. Inside a mint and a hard candy. Just like he was here with us.

When Bob would show up, he had a pocket full of hard candy, usually peppermint. At the calling hours, his wife Cindy said that after he passed, she found a mint in her bathrobe that she had not put there. 

When my wife and I saw the mint package, we teared up. (Jacob has his unopened package on his nightstand beside his bed.) 

This writing took me longer than I wanted because there is a part of me struggling with the loss. Only this morning, a fellow car guy, came up to me and talked to me about Bob’s passing. 

Jacob and I first met Bob, in late April of 2023. We were sitting at a table, and he walked by and stopped at our table, and he was a little “grumpy.” He even gave Jacob a bit of time. I talked to him about that.  

And so began our relationship! He put a couple of mints on the table. A few days later, I saw him there, and he brought in some coins he wanted to show us and some Keene and Winchester minted $5 bills! (At a subsequent meeting, he shared his Hawaii bills.) 

Bob letting Jacob get into his classic T-Top Trans Am. (This picture was in the slide show during calling hours.)

What began to happen is he wanted to share bits of history and his past. (In so many respects he reminded me of my dad. Military, occasionally gruff, hard worker, and a smile.) 

Over the last few years, we have often sat beside him and his wife at the coffee shop. We began to develop a relationship. He would frequently show up and put his hand on Jacob’s shoulder. They would talk about cars, car websites, and more. 

Our conversations might be about history. We talked a lot about things from our generation. Many conversations began to turn to stories about hunting trips and travel. He shared about when he worked for the power company, trips, he and his wife took for vacations, and more.  

He was the kind of guy that would connect with people as he walked into the restaurant.   

What I noticed was he was always glad to see Jacob. And he talked to him. He would share things like his work with the Boy Scouts. (One day he had ropes and wanted to teach Jacob knots. ) 

My wife and I often saw them and sat near them to talk. We became good friends.  

One of our common denominators was old cars. Bob had an older Trans Am and a ’56 Ford. Jacob and I would see him at shows all the time. He would sit in his chair, “holding court” while talking to people. He often had some vintage curb detectors and he would ask people to tell him what they were for. 

When Jacob and I showed up, we frequently talked to him and some of those nearby. Sometimes, we would bring him a bottle of water.  

We love Bob and Cindy.  

One afternoon, we showed up for a car show. Bob looked up at me and said, “I have cancer.” He pointed to his esophagus and told me some more. Admittedly, it was a shock. 

Over the next few weeks, we saw him and Cindy quite a bit. We didn’t discuss it much, but I saw the treatments weighed a bit.  

We saw him a few days before he passed. We talked, he told a couple of jokes, and as we left, I put my hand on his and told him I loved him. 

The following Monday, Cindy called me. Jacob and I were sitting in the coffee shop. The phone lit up with his name. Cindy relayed what had happened. His organs had begun to shut down and he wanted to come home “and die on his terms. That Sunday, he passed away. His family was around him. 

Jacob in Bob King’s 1956 Ford Victoria

While I spoke to her, I was tearing up in the restaurant. After the call, I told Jacob and came home to tell my wife. 

I will miss his gruffness, smile, jokes, and so many other things. He was proud of his family; we regularly talked about them. He wasn’t a big fan of cell phones and would tell you so. He loved his wife and his family and enjoyed his cars.  

Bob, I thought of you so many mornings just in the last few weeks as I went into the coffee shop. You added value to my life and the lives of Jacob and my wife. Cindy and family, I am so sorry for your loss.  

The world lost a great guy. I and many others will miss you.

Powerless Over Cars

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